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Judging Parker: Week Two

Posted in Uncategorized by cesco7 on September 4, 2016

Before we begin, here is a fantastic illustration of what the future may bring—Judge Dredd Parker—drawn by Tom Racine, who does the fantastic Tall Tale Radio comics podcast that is truly a must-listen.
Judge Dredd Parker

Okay, this week’s “Judging Parker” is going to be short for one reason: Yesterday while at a cafe I pushed my chair back, the back legs slid off a small platform, I fell backwards, could find no support, and smashed my mouth straight into a metal guardrail. While somehow I did not lose any teeth (so far, fingers crossed) the result was a non-stop, multidirectional ketchup sprinkler. Right now the only lingering result seems to be a fat lip, for which I am very lucky. I guess I could have said I got it in a bar fight, but anyone who knows me in the slightest wouldn’t believe that. I did once get shot in the lip with a bb gun, but that doesn’t sound manly at my age. So guard rail and copious blood it is.

And now I allow a moment for the people who will celebrate the fact I slashed my mouth open—the same who have made death threats since I took over Judge Parker—because social media is fun like that.

So here are the most salient points:

1. No, this will not turn into Garrick: The Comic.
2. Yes, the police and emergency units finally arrived and yes, there will be results.
3. Otoliths are the three small chalky bodies in the inner ear of vertebrates that rest on your hair cells and determine your sense of gravity and balance, both of which were not my friend yesterday.


Back to applying ice!


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7 Responses

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  1. Naked Bunny with a Whip said, on September 4, 2016 at 11:43 am

    It was a clash of wills between Ces and gravity. In the end, Ces walked away, victorious.

  2. Cat Wisdom 101 (@catwisdom101) said, on September 4, 2016 at 2:18 pm

    Life imitating art is not funny is this instance. You’re not a method actor. “This is not how you bleed… guard rail..” Healing purrs arriving across the pond.

  3. Gidget said, on September 4, 2016 at 7:00 pm

    So sorry to hear that – hope you heal quickly!

  4. Jim said, on September 5, 2016 at 12:32 am

    I’m just going to have to turn to the huge Garrick Panini fanfic community.

  5. Bill said, on September 5, 2016 at 10:32 am

    Echoing the sane thoughts of others and hope you heal quickly and inexpensively.

  6. hankgillette said, on September 6, 2016 at 3:34 am

    Ouch! Good on keeping your teeth! Bad on the rest.

    The only major complaint I hear is that the cops are standing around cracking jokes, waiting for dawn, rather than breaking out a flashlight or search light and looking for the van. I think that has some validity. I understand that cops make jokes because of the stressful line of work they are in, but I would expect them to do their job and joke later.

    I wouldn’t wish harm on anyone working on a comic strip, not even Tom Batiuk. I certainly understand that there is going to be a transition period when taking over a strip and feeling comfortable with your “new” characters. Other than that one point, I think you’re doing fine so far, and I look forward to what you do with the Parkers/Drivers, assuming of course, that you leave any of them alive.

  7. LBD "Nytetrayn" said, on September 11, 2016 at 3:48 am

    Please take small comfort in knowing that my Judge Parker readership has increased 10,000% since you took over.

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