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Conversations with Dad: The Visit

Posted in Uncategorized by cesco7 on December 9, 2016

As some of you may know, I recently lost my dad. It’s been a tough time, but rather than focus solely on the great sadness I’ve also been reflecting on all the joy and oddball moments he brought into my life. So with that in mind I share the following actual holiday memory. It starts shortly after I have arrived at my parents’ front door and ring the doorbell. I hear the entire conversation happening from inside the house.
wreath-doors-banner

Doorbell rings.

Mom: Who is it?

Dad: Coming!

Mom: Who is it?

Dad: What do you mean, “Who is it?” It’s probably Ces!

Mom: Coming!

Dad: We’re coming!

Mom: Hold on, we’re coming!

Dad: Be right there!

Mom: Coming!

Dad: I said I was coming!

Mom: Be right there!

Dad: What does “I’m coming” mean to you, Isilda?!

Mom: Hold on!

Dad: I said I got it!

Mom: Just a sec!

A few minutes pass.

Dad: Did you get the door, Isilda?

Mom: What?!

Dad: I said, “Did you get the door, Isilda?!”

Mom: What?!

Dad: DID YOU GET THE DAMN DOOR OR NOT?!?

Mom: I thought you were getting the door!

Dad: How could I get the door?! I’m in the bedroom painting the chair!

Mom: Well, I’m in the kitchen making you your tea!

Dad: How complicated is tea-making that you can’t get the door?!

Mom: But I thought you said you were getting it!

Dad: Well, do you want the chair done today or not?!

Mom: Well, do you want your tea done today or what?!

Dad: Tea or chair, Isilda! Tea or chair!

Mom: Fine, I’ll drink your tea!

Another minute passes.

Dad: What did you say?!

Mom: What?

Dad: What did you say about the tea?

Mom: What?

Dad: WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT THE TEA?!?

Mom: I said I’ll drink your tea!

Dad: Are you trying to be a wiseass?!

Mom: You don’t want me to make you tea then I’ll drink it!

Dad: When the hell am I supposed to finish the chair then, Isilda?! Huh?! When?!

Mom: Just forget it!

A few more minutes pass.

Dad: What did you say?!

Mom: What?!

Dad: What did you say?! Just before!

Mom: I said, “Just forget it!”

Dad: You know I don’t forget stuff, Isilda!

Mom: You forgot to answer the door!

Dad: You still haven’t let Ces in yet?!

Mom: I was making tea!

Dad: I was painting the chair!

Mom: Fine, I’ll get the door!

Dad:No, I’ll get it!

Mom: I’m getting it!

Dad: I said I’m getting it!

Mom: I’m almost there!

Dad: I said I’m getting it, Isilda!

Mom: I don’t need you to get it!

Dad: Oh, I’m getting it!

Mom: Then open the door!

Dad: Fine! I guess I’ll have to get it!

Hear footsteps approaching. Hear doorknob being jiggled. Pause.

Dad: Where did you put the keys, Isilda?!

Mom: What?!

Dad: WHERE DID YOU PUT THE KEYS, ISILDA?!

Mom: Tea’s done! 

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6 Responses

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  1. ChipG said, on December 9, 2016 at 10:33 am

    Sorry to hear of the loss of your dad. I’ve enjoyed reading about his eccentric conversations on the blog over the years.

  2. Thumper said, on December 9, 2016 at 10:36 am

    OMG I think the Spouse Thingy and I are turning into your parents…

  3. Bill said, on December 9, 2016 at 11:53 am

    Please accept my deepest condolences on the loss of your father. Thank you for sharing this family conversation because it brought a smile to my face.

  4. mintzworks said, on December 10, 2016 at 5:57 am

    I echo the above from ChipG. Sorry for your loss, but the blog posts about your visits and convos with your father are the stuff of legend. Thank you immensely for sharing those.

  5. maradanto said, on December 10, 2016 at 1:13 pm

    I’m sorry to hear that your dad has passed away. I’m glad you have such strong memories of him, and that you’re willing to share them with us.

  6. Paul1963 said, on December 12, 2016 at 11:05 am

    Great story, Ces. Sorry for your loss.


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