What the Hell Was Ted Doing?!
I recently came across this old 80s Sally Forth collection that pre-dates my writing duties and I have to ask—Did Ted go on some caffeine (note coffee mug)/nicotine (note ash tray)/coke (note spoon in bowl)—fueled bender before ripping off all his clothes, blaring the boom box, and recreating the final dance sequence from Pat Benatar’s “Love Is a Battlefield” video? Also, apparently Ted became so fascinated with a box of Land O’Lakes butter that he started automatic writing in his notebook before jumping rope to get out all the toxins that kept screaming in his ear, “Take the shot, Ted! Take that basketball and hurl it straight through the glass cube divider that was mandatory in all 80s kitchens, Ted! DO IT!!!”
UPDATE: My girlfriend Stacey adds—So is this Ted’s A.D.H.D. breakdown? “I’m going to work! No! I’m going to vacuum! No! I’m going to play marbles while writing my screenplay and drinking hot chocolate! FUCK THOSE DOCTORS! I DON’T NEED MEDICATION!!!!!“
You Are Toast
For the past few years the characters of Sally Forth have enjoyed “Powdered Toast Crunch” cereal in a nod to the cartoon series Ren and Stimpy. Exactly one month ago two brave women revealed to Buzzfeed that the creator of that series, John Kricfalusi, had sexually harassed them while they were underaged and engaged in a sexual relationship with one of them when she was 16.
Today marks the end of that cereal appearance and any reference to Kricfalusi’s work in our comic. To anyone who disagrees with our decision, you can draw attention to his cartoons in your own damn strip. That is not what will be happening here.
NOTE: I just realized I wrote “Stimpy” as “Stmipy.” Let’s chalk that up to something subconscious and not the perhaps more obvious “learn to type.”
Happy Independent Bookstore Day!
Please support your local bookstore on Independent Bookstore Day and every day. You’re not just helping a business. You’re helping a community.
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